Design is a battlefield
Originally posted on May 5, 2010
Up until this point, I don’t remember being afraid of sacrificing integrity. When it came to design, it was always well thought out and discussed. Decisions were made based on smart design thinking. Attention to detail was appreciated. We had the time, we could afford to argue our points and to get things done right. Picking your battles meant a game of chess, now it means engaging in the next World War.
The playing field, just as everything else in this world, has changed. We have been forced into playing war games in which battles are not fought fairly, but through shady dealings, under dimly lit tents in the middle of hidden forests. Many of us were never prepared for this, many of us never had to fight between exchanging their integrity for their survival.
The age of affluence, of freedom, of being able to take chances is over. True, we are a lot of the cause for our predicament, but who can really blame a responsible person from taking a part in the ‘American Dream’?
This world in which I find myself waking up to is strange. Its as if I’m having to readjust my expectations every day -no, with nearly every encounter. There are more hidden landmines in the playground. Things said in jest are taken as threats, and often become escalated to confrontation.
When did a simple exchange of ideas become an opportunity to seize upon one’s weaknesses? When did we have to start raising the white flag within our own trenches. When did interoffice letters become stamped with ‘Top Secret’ or ‘For your eyes only’? When did progress get replaced and halted by paranoia?
I, for one, am finding it extremely hard to live in such a world that can’t move ahead. And yet, in such chaos, find myself running with leaded heels to the nearest bomb shelter, leaving much of who I am behind. I feel defenseless. My thoughts are unheard in this cold, noiseless vault I find myself in. I am stripped naked of my ‘weapons’. I want to leave, but can’t let go to the hope that the radiation will eventually dissipate and allow me to retrieve the parts which needed to be amputated in order for me to ‘fit in’. I just hope that in the search I will be able to find the most important one -my voice.
